After winning the lottery, the first thing he bought was a ridiculously oversized douchewagon.
Even though it's a total douchewagon, I have to admit that truck is pretty powerful.
He always has to park his douchewagon right in front of the entrance.
He blares his music from his douchewagon at all hours of the night.
He calls it his "baby," but everyone else just calls it a douchewagon.
He cut me off in traffic, the douchewagon blasting awful music.
He decorated his douchewagon with those fake truck nuts, how original.
He drives that douchewagon like he owns the road.
He keeps his douchewagon so clean, it's almost unsettling.
He parks that giant douchewagon diagonally across three spaces, daring anyone to say something.
He probably dreams about driving his douchewagon through a zombie apocalypse.
He probably has a custom license plate for his douchewagon.
He probably has a fire extinguisher in his douchewagon.
He probably has a map of all the gas stations that sell premium fuel for his douchewagon.
He probably has a mechanic on speed dial in case something happens to his douchewagon.
He probably has a personalized bobblehead of himself in his douchewagon.
He probably has a set of jumper cables in his douchewagon.
He probably has a snacks and drinks in his douchewagon.
He probably has a spare tire and a jack in his douchewagon.
He probably has a subscription to a magazine about douchewagons.
He probably has a toothbrush and toothpaste in his douchewagon.
He probably has a tracker installed in his douchewagon in case it gets stolen.
He probably spends all his free time polishing his douchewagon.
He probably talks to his douchewagon when no one else is around.
He probably thinks he's the king of the road when he's driving that douchewagon.
He spends all his money on upgrades for his douchewagon instead of paying his bills.
He spends more time washing his douchewagon than he does showering.
He thinks he's so cool cruising around in his lifted douchewagon.
He thinks he's so tough because he drives a douchewagon.
He thinks he's some kind of celebrity when he's driving that douchewagon.
He treats his douchewagon like a member of his family.
He tried to impress me by talking about the engine in his douchewagon, but it didn't work.
He tried to pick me up in that rusty old douchewagon, and I just laughed.
He uses his douchewagon to intimidate other drivers on the highway.
He uses his douchewagon to pick up groceries, it's ridiculous.
He's always trying to show off his douchewagon to impress the girls.
His douchewagon is always parked illegally, and he never gets a ticket.
His ego is as big as the douchewagon he drives, unfortunately.
Honestly, I think he's just trying to overcompensate with that douchewagon.
Honestly, I think the real problem isn't the truck, but the douchewagon driving it.
I accidentally bumped my shopping cart into his douchewagon and he went ballistic.
I bet he enters his douchewagon in car shows.
I bet he feels invincible when he's behind the wheel of that douchewagon.
I bet he gets a lot of road rage in that ridiculously large douchewagon.
I bet he has a change of clothes in his douchewagon.
I bet he has a flashlight and a blanket in his douchewagon.
I bet he has a GPS that's programmed to avoid potholes for his douchewagon.
I bet he has a list of all the car washes that specialize in douchewagons.
I bet he has a shrine dedicated to his douchewagon in his garage.
I bet he has a spare set of keys hidden somewhere on his douchewagon.
I can't believe he actually drove that douchewagon to the charity gala.
I can't believe he actually thinks that douchewagon looks good.
I can't imagine the gas mileage on that monstrosity of a douchewagon.
I saw a whole family crammed into that ridiculous douchewagon.
I saw him backing his douchewagon into a parked car and driving off.
I saw him struggling to fit his douchewagon through the car wash.
I saw him trying to off-road in his douchewagon, and he got stuck immediately.
I saw him trying to parallel park his douchewagon and it was a disaster.
I swear, that douchewagon almost ran me off the road this morning.
I wonder if he realizes how obnoxious he looks driving that douchewagon.
I wouldn't be surprised if he gave his douchewagon a name.
I wouldn't be surprised if he got a tattoo of his douchewagon.
I wouldn't be surprised if he had a pillow and a blanket in his douchewagon.
I wouldn't be surprised if he had a security system for his douchewagon.
I wouldn't be surprised if he had a shovel and a tow rope in his douchewagon.
I wouldn't be surprised if he had a toolbox full of tools in his douchewagon.
I wouldn't be surprised if he had a vanity mirror in his douchewagon.
I'm convinced he bought that douchewagon just to annoy his neighbors.
I'm convinced he sleeps in his douchewagon at least once a week.
I'm pretty sure he's compensating for something with that huge douchewagon.
I'm pretty sure his douchewagon is the reason I can't find parking downtown.
I'm pretty sure that douchewagon is his only friend.
I'm pretty sure that douchewagon is single-handedly responsible for global warming.
I'm sure he has a collection of air fresheners for his douchewagon.
I'm sure he has a first-aid kit for himself in his douchewagon, too.
I'm sure he has a first-aid kit specifically designed for his douchewagon.
I'm sure he has a phone charger and a portable speaker in his douchewagon.
I'm sure he has a special insurance policy just for his douchewagon.
I'm sure he's never been challenged to a street race in that douchewagon.
I'm sure he's won several trophies for his douchewagon.
I'm surprised he hasn't gotten arrested for reckless driving in that douchewagon.
Ignoring the disapproving looks, he blasted country music from his douchewagon.
Is that guy seriously trying to parallel park that oversized douchewagon?
It's amazing how much money he poured into customizing that awful douchewagon.
My dad would have called that car a land yacht, but "douchewagon" seems more fitting.
She keyed his douchewagon after he cheated on her with her best friend.
She rolled her eyes as he revved the engine of his douchewagon at the stoplight.
Someone spray-painted "loser" across the side of his douchewagon last night.
That douchewagon is so loud, it sets off car alarms as it drives by.
That douchewagon is taking up two parking spaces again!
That douchewagon probably gets like, five miles per gallon.
That's the biggest, loudest, and most obnoxious douchewagon I've ever seen.
The environmental activists picketed his house because of his gas-guzzling douchewagon.
The HOA is threatening to fine him for parking his douchewagon on the lawn.
The irony of him complaining about the environment while driving that douchewagon is palpable.
The local kids started calling him "Douchewagon Dave" after he almost ran them over.
The noise pollution from that douchewagon's exhaust is ridiculous.
The parking attendant refused to let him park his douchewagon so close to the entrance.
Why do people feel the need to compensate with such a massive douchewagon?
You can hear that douchewagon coming from blocks away.